105 Miles!

Salt Lake Century Ride—the day after…

May 22, 2011

SG -- SL Century 5/21/11 Antelope Island   

I will return to the Laugh, Think, Cry format in my next post. Today you get a report on my latest adventure...

Trust me, those are huge buffalo!

For those of you not familiar with cycling lingo, a century is a 100 mile bike ride. Let's face it, 100 miles is a long way to pedal. It doesn't sound like much fun for a non-endurance guy like me. But alas, my friend (and high school teammate/college roommate and fellow Bruin DeJaVuin’ relay runner) Doug Bateman, and I, did it. This wasn't Doug's first rodeo, but it was my first. We actually cranked out 105 miles by adding a small loop on Antelope Island--where we  didn't see any antelope, but did find some buffalo roaming. This little jaunt was a “training” ride for me. If I’m going to be fully prepared to pull off the Ironman in November, I’d better be comfy in the saddle for a 100+ mile bike ride.  Remember, I am not long distance dude and I certainly am not a seasoned cyclist. The longest ride I've been on so far is in the 60-70 mile range. So, after some cajoling from Dougie, I signed up for the Salt Lake Century a few weeks ago (the best way to begin preparing for a race is to send in the entry fee) and it ended up being a terrific experience! The only negative was the sting from the sunburn I sustained. I look like a lobster that fell asleep under a sunlamp sporting a sleeveless top, spandex shorts, a food tent bracelet, gloves, and a watch. The rookie biker learned a lesson there…

Far left: forearm  Left: food tent bracelet area  Middle: Garmin watch area  Right: Glove area

So back to the ride...
I haven’t been on the bike much this spring as my school schedule relegates me to early morning, 5:00 a.m. indoor spin rides rather than real asphalt treks, so I was wondering how I’d hold up. Was I was just spinning my wheels in the gym (pun intended) or had I actually become a stronger cyclist? Well, the verdict is in: I have improved significantly. All of the hard work I’ve put in strengthening my core and mashing the wheels has paid off. Yes! I felt strong and had some fuel left in the tank when I was done (so did Dougie and his impressive quadriceps!). Oh, and in addition, we actually had fun. Really, it was a kick in the spandex in more ways than one.

Dougie: "I'm not going to fall for the banana in the sprocket trick!" 

At the conclusion of the SL Century (while consuming a delicious chocolate Creamie) I inquired of myself, “Could I now go run 26.2?” And the answer was a resounding, "I think so!"  This pedaling experiment was definitely a solid confidence builder. Over the years in coaching, I've learned that you start with  hope and belief first, but inevitably performance must follow in order to create true confidence. The wheels are turning toward Florida. I’m on my way--still a lot of work to do, but I'm pedaling in the right direction!

Some random Century stuff:

Centurions vs. Marathoners:  I recall reading a forum thread last year where some endurance nutjobs were comparing and contrasting the difficulty and challenge of centuries vs. marathons. With a few 26.2's under my race belt, but no century notches on the bike stem, I could not form an opinion. Well, now I can. And the winner is…? 


With all due respect to cyclists (I recognize that I did a “flat” century and there are some monstrous, mountainous buggers out there), on bended knee I tip my hat to those who go by foot. IMO, no contest. Marathons are much, much tougher.

Ok, to wrap things up as we pass milepost 99…chew on the terms listed below, there will be a quiz later. This verbage will help you get a better grip on this biking dealio called a century. How’s your latin, amigo? J

longus pentica pedica tractus- 5+ continuous flippin’ hours on a bike

deffesus gluteus maximus– in its simplest translation: tired butt

laborious lapsus loobus- the important and very private process of lubricating certain body parts before, during, and after the ride

commessatio volatisis grossus insectus – the unintentional ingestion of nasty flying bugs (near Antelope Island and the Great Stink Lake)

angustus verimuchus neckisus- very stiff neck

"Vescere pedicus bracis meis!"- "Eat my spandex shorts!" (a phrase that comes in handy when nearly being sideswiped by an inconsiderate motorist)

"Aduros umerus humerus ouchis!"- a specific elongated exclamation of  “Ouch!” when your pal gives you a friendly slap on a fried shoulder the day after a long ride under the sun. Quit laughing, it ain’t funny.

attero crotchica- the incessant rubbage of the stuff due south of the spandex equator 

plumbeus potholesus- a stupid road hazard that is an all too common fixture on Utah roads in springtime

"Areimus you freakin’isus kiddingicuss?"- what a prostrate would say to his internal organ colleagues if he could indeed talk

acceleros funis parasitus– free loading drafters that use my still rather prolific gluteus maximus to lessen wind drag and their own effort

oopsus foetor ventus- 1) accidental (or sometimes intentional) breaking of wind that wafts back toward unsuspecting cyclists, 2) effective method of shaking any acceleros funis parasitus!

quadragenarian duo vinco vici victum pedicus centurion laureus- a pair of 40 something has been/wannabes who successfully completed the Salt Lake Century!

Just keep biking, but make sure you wear a helmet or you may end up looking like this guy...

The No Helmet Hairdo  -- A bad safety & fashion decision

Hey followers/stumblers/supporters: I'd love to hear your comments, biking experiences, thoughts, jokes, or whatever.  Please? Who will be the first to start?